A message about Frank:

Our most beloved Frank Mehr died on February 28, 2022. Family and friends had flooded the hospital to say goodbye. And he passed with a small collection of family and friends by his side.

Born in Tehran, Iran, Frank was a caring and passionate young boy and young man. He could be found hiding an injured animal in his room, for his mother to find. He thought it was important for every child to have a place to play soccer, even if that place was someone else’s overgrown land. And he had a thirst for knowledge from poetry to math. While studying in Oxford, Frank decided to join the Iranian Navy and serve like so many of the people in his family, coming to the US to be trained by the US Navy in the 70s. But 1979 brought him permanently to the US, when the Iranian Revolution broke out.

It was in the US that he found his love of technology and his belief that anything is possible and can be overcome, while completing his education at GW and then Virginia Tech. When asked if something could be done, he would often say, “it’s just software”. His intellect, leadership, and vision brought much success for him. But more important to him, it was the environment and relationships he created that revolved around being truthful, joyful, peaceful, and respectful that brought his teams’ success over the years and gave him an extended family of friends.

Frank’s life was the perfect combination of a wise old soul, brilliant technical mind, and lover of childish humor and fun. He is often referred to as a mentor, guide, and brother whose smile made everything better. He was known for his advice and encouragement. He was always creating something geeky at work or at home. From black ops projects that turned into the next great product capability, to digitizing every song, picture, and document before it was a thing, to using Raspberry Pis throughout the house to make his own weather stations and photo displays, to making every cabinet, step, door, path lit with LEDs. There truly are LEDs everywhere. This was all done on what he called his 3rd shift. And Frank loved silliness. He laughed at his own jokes. Taught his wife beautiful Persian poetry, only to find out he changed the words to be less than appropriate. Could eat an entire pie for dinner with a big smile. And because he did not have any children, he felt it was his duty to be the uncle who swooped in, destroyed all sense of discipline, and then swoop out. As parents tried to put limits on their children, Frank’s feeling was “nah”. Surrounding all of this, was the man who had a hug and a smile for anyone who wanted one. Who literally gave people the shirt off his back. And was the person who opened his home to all who visited to experience the beautiful Persian culture and food he loved so much.

As Frank settled in New Hampshire for the long haul, after expecting to be here for only a couple of years, the outdoors became his passion. He created a true home to lay his head. He spent a few months designing and building a pizza oven. Granted, he only cooked in it twice. But in true Frank fashion, he said, “I didn’t build it to cook in. I built it for the process.” He created his own Persian kabob appliance for the BBQ, so that people could experience kabob the way he had as a boy. He built a pergola for flowers to climb, and a hydroponic garden for vegetables and herbs. Eventually, he even was able to have his dream of a green house. It was a bit bigger than he told his wife it would be, so it was nicknamed the Green Mansion. Sadly, he was never able to plant in the Green Mansion, but he loved every second of watching it being built exactly as he envisioned. And then spending multiple weekends building the planter boxes and new hydroponics. And of course, there is a notebook with exactly what he wanted planted in each area. But Frank’s passions were never disconnected, and that is why Frank’s Green Mansion has computers, network, automation, and LED lights.

Frank always felt nurture was an important piece of what makes a person who they are. He got his compassion from his mother, his leadership from one uncle, and his humor and poetic voice from his other uncle. He felt interactions could change a life. And he made his interactions impactful to everyone. These qualities continue in his nephews Ali and Arash.

But 2021 and 2022 did create changes that could not be overcome. Frank knew this was the case. He said, “my body just won’t reboot.” He was wise, technical, and funny all in one small statement.

Donations

Frank was not aware of what was happening in Ukraine. However, if he had, he would have been doing everything possible to help those in need. He would have been up around the clock making sure people were safe. He, more than most, understood what it was like to be forced from your home. To hold on to every ounce of culture you could. And to find a way to stand up for your beliefs, no matter the cost. It is because of this that I ask you to donate, however much you can, to a charity helping people of Ukraine. There are many, but here are a few:

• GoFundMe has a hub that they will distribute to other reputable charities
• Razom is purchasing and distributing medical supplies
• World Central Kitchen is providing meals for families fleeing and remaining in Ukraine

There will not be a formal service or funeral, as that was not what Frank wanted. Something will be done in the spring/summer, the time Frank loved to spend outside. Information will be here once planned.

A message from Laurie:

Gor boo neto.
Hezar miliunta.
Shab be khayr.
I love you.
Khaylee bishtaras dota khaylee.

That is how we said goodnight every night. It was what Frank would call “Laursi”…the Laurie way of speaking Farsi.

Frank and I could not have been more different when we met. I dressed like a hippy, he wore corduroys and cashmere. I swore like a truck driver, he spoke poetically. I did not drink any caffeine, Frank practically lived on it. Frank only spoke when he had something to say, I, somehow always had something to say. Frank took time in getting up each morning, while my eyes opened and started the day. (He could often be heard saying, “shhhhhhh” as I told him all the things I had already accomplished before the sun came up.) But for 20 years, we made it work. We used to joke that I got Frank’s good habits, and Frank got my bad ones. I started to organize my shoes in boxes with labels, and Frank was super excited when his once pressed pair of jeans had its first hole. Of course, those jeans became “yard jeans”. He would never wear them in public. But who would have thought he would ever have clothes that were designated to yard work?

Frank and I spent every minute of every day together by choice. Whether those minutes were spent working, running errands, being in the yard, or doing nothing, we were within whispering distance of each other at any given moment. When Frank started going through his health changes, he didn’t like the feeling of “relying” on me. But to me, we were together every minute of every day, so what changed? But what changed was each of those minutes took on a new level of importance. As different as the past year+ was, it was also inspiring. His mind was never far from his team and what he envisioned for the next phases of technology. He went from scooting, to hopping, to walking in record time. He never wallowed. He never had any regrets. He did not go through the “phases of loss”. He accepted because there was no point in not accepting. That would waste his minutes with me. But we are talking about Frank, so it was also full of jokes and laughs. No one got sick quite like Frank. He asked the doctor if he could keep his foot so he could put LEDs on it. He put LEDs on his wheelchair. He bought the coolest of the cool walker. He bought funny t-shirts. His favorite being “I’m not going to say an alien took my foot, but an alien took my foot.” And he wore them proudly. This was how Frank lived his life.

I had 20 amazing years with Frank. Someone who brought peace and serenity into my life. Someone who felt his sole purpose was to take care of me. Someone who always wondered what he had done to find me, but everyone knows it was me who must have done something right. And occasionally, when he would think about his life and the turns it took, and why those turns may have happened, he would always say “but without those, I would never have found you.” Every day of Frank’s life was lived with gratitude and warmth. I just hope I can take what Frank taught me about life and be a fraction of the person he was.

Gor boo neto.
Hezar miliunta.
Shab be khayr.
I love you.
Khaylee bishtaras dota khaylee.

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